Chapter 8. The 1 million stand-up bots

The true story

All week, we only deal with the fact that stigmatized bot buyers. We don’t approve this behavior and will continue to expand the hall of shame. But today we'll make an exception. We could not imagine that we would have to write a positive article about the million bots buyer. Well, if he does not pay us a million dollars. But now we will write it. Well, we put it on your bill, pay later.

All our previous characters pretended that their followers are real people. They just lie about their audience without blinking. On the other hand, why would they confess. But we found a man who said that he made the purchase of bots. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, today we write about the first public bot buying coming-out. We think that this is not the last confession, which we will see.

He did it two years before our experiment and spent on it over $5. Now we are ashamed that we were so greedy. Maybe we should have to buy more?

In fact, he also made the experiment. But we were interested primarily statistics and the man checked the social reaction.

He describes it as a global tragedy.

What a nuisance! $ 400 has been spent, but no one even noticed. Now, 2 years later, someone is interested in it. We care about this shit, man. You can’t even imagine what we care about all this social media shit. Oh, we still have not given you our character today? Meet our special guest, Joe Mande!


After hundreds of evening shows and publications, he finally arrived on

We don’t write, who is Joe. If you don’t know who is it, you have a gun to shoot yourself the Internet to find it. Damn, it appears he has already talked about the fact that he bought bots in the Washington Post and Yahoo.

Joe, we analyzed all of your followers. And did it absolutely disinterestedly. But the article is not free, do you remember? So, we have a set of statistics about your bots. It is interesting, isn’t it? You probably want to know your fans closer. What are their interests, whom they read, how often they tweet?

Not everyone has so many fans, you have to be attentive to them. Oh, you already do! Joe, we admire you! February 14 you declared your love to the bot-girls!

Surely, they are flattered by your attention! By the way, does Kyle know you're flirting with Russian beauties?

Many of your fans are alone in this world. 270,000 of them do not have their followers. Maybe you should support them? Follow them, then each of them will have at least one friend.

What are the most popular accounts among your followers? Oh, we already met them recently. If you read the previous articles, you know them too.

48% Angel Rivera @Angelluisr

35% David Copperfield @D_Copperfield

34% PopWrapped @PopWrapped

30% Kaz Aston @kazaston

24% King James ♛ @LeBronJames

Yes, Joe, this is the botnet, which we have already been contacted in our five dollar experiment. Thesebots can be purchased at, BenJuergensen and apparently, even in a hundred places. But they increase the audience for the same accounts.

There is one that we can not fail to mention. It says a lot about your fans. 146,795 of them follow @pertasperlite

It also has a perfect site!

According to your social media analytics data, you should pay more attention to perlite. This is a very important topic for your followers.

What else is missing in this article? Maybe the Danish fairy-tales of the 19th century? Are bots follow the account of Hans Christian Andersen? No, it would be too much.

The sad question

In the fairytale “The Emperor's New Clothes” only the boy could say that the king is really naked. Who can tell the truth today? Is it only the Jewish stand-up comic sitting on the lap of Stephen Curry?